Academics/ All Mine/ The Eyes of the Enemy/ I Hide My Rage Behind My Tears/ Kissing the Rain/ Lady's Fingers/ Melissa/ Midnight Excursion by the Moon/ My Sanctuary/ Mystery Moon/ Ode to Writing/ Sister With Your Silver Tears/ Stormy Weather Friends/ To Walk With An Angel/ Water on the Hand
Academics
Your the thorns in my back
And the ache in my feet
If I had the choice
You I would beat
Into the ground
Like you did to me
Crush your self-worth
Hang your soul from a tree.
Yet I regard with resentment
Your purpose in life
Understand the world?
With you I just might
For where it has been
And where it is now
And the space in between.
If I were more open
Then I'd give you thanks
For what you have taught me
While nailing me to the planks.
All Mine
The moment's all mine
None else do see
The splendor of the beauty
The glamour of the trees.
As they remain stuck
In their isolated cubes
I hear the birds sing
And the leaves dance when they choose.
The sun bounces off the excellence
Of a tree that stands my stare
As the wind brushes me carefully
And sweeps away my cares.
The Eyes of the Enemy
I've seen the eyes of my enemy
As she stood daunting and proud
Caught in a stare what did I see
The anguish of a fear so loud.
She's known injustice my enemy
It's beaten her down with hearty blows
And in her despair she takes it out on me
The reasons for her maneuvers never show.
Not until now, now I see
Why she's hurt me so bad, my mortal flesh
She suffers of fatigue for eternity
Unless my knowledge I test.
Why would she want to suffer I do ask
And how can I stop her horror
I would do anything if I knew the task
Knowing would make me surer.
That I am a somebody which she argues against
That I can save both of our lives
So to her aggressor- I'll make you repent
Not only once but twice.
I Hide My Rage Behind My Tears
I hide my rage behind my tears
Watching my torn life poked with spears
Though I've had the experience of many years
I still hide my rage behind my tears.
I crumble away as the world sneers
I pick myself up as society leers
My frame a mirror- they know my fears,
Though I hide my rage behind my tears.
I watch as my innocence disappears
Through the shattered glass my eyes do peer
I watch the children with all of their cheer
As I hide my rage behind my tears.
Kissing the Rain
We're all in this enclosure,
We call society.
Drifting in and out of circles,
Of family and friends.
Some times we feel the sun shine on our excellence,
Sometimes we stand out in the rain,
Cold splashes pouring onto our open wounds,
Blinded by the excellence that excludes us.
And on our own we find refuge in different ways,
Some people run, some people scream,
As for me, I just cry,
Holding old classics and my classics to my breast,
An aegis,
And when I'm in control of myself, I write.
And although I'm not enjoying the warmth of the sun,
I can finally find some comfort in my rain.
Lady's Fingers
Her lacy fingers doth hold the thread
Cascading down to the woven floor
Like waterfalls of pure white grace
She laughs and begs her soul for more.
What clouds lie 'head the horizon she knows
Little of, she chooses to care,
But to remain happy as the story goes,
The predictions give her no scare.
As thunder rolls her spirit not
Broken by the ruined day
But as the rain hits her she falls apart
Back to birth- the molten clay.
Melissa
A smiling lanky girl
Graceful and free
In your reflection
I see me.
I feel so lucky!
As I pour over our past.
Stuffed animals, movies,
And lots of laughs.
Is there a reason
That G-d granted me you?
All I know is that I'm thankful
My best friend pure and true.
Midnight Excursion by the Moon
Now I disrupt the flow of my life
Unchanged as I fall into the same traps
I long to take a midnight excursion by the moon
And shed this skin which holds me captive
And live.
I breathe in the ancient trees and bathe in the moonlight
Do you recognize me friend?
Am I the same little girl who was previously
Trapped in the snares of the gates of Hell?
Can you believe as you see me standing
That I, devils advocate, am also angel?
Have you the knowledge?
I do!
For if I didn't then how could I be here?
Has this magical air scent and sound
When I am blind to its beauty?
How my gales of laughter fall
On the soft moonlight.
I'll tell you this friend, I have to go back
I feel it instinctively in my knowledgeable bones
I will once again recede into the darkness.
But promise me this, if you find the secret of life
Whisper it in a laughing gale
At a midnight excursion by the moon.
My Sanctuary
A waft of berry greets me
My life stacked on the floor
My soul posted on the walls
Glance at the words fills me with new hope
As I get ready for the next leg of my journey
And face the world once more.
Mystery Moon
Sly, sleek white moon sister
Understands no one your soul
Of using sun's light.
Ode to Writing
I don't know all the boys' names,
As teenagers demand,
Nor lust for singing, or composers,
As my mother desires,
And my academic lack of confidence,
Makes it impossible to please myself.
But you,
In you, the rosy-scented illusion,
The flowing pen, the choppy words,
I confide my talent, my lust, my desire,
And no one else, not even myself, can comprehend,
What freedom you give me,
To express,
What little I have.
Sister With Your Silver Tears
Sister with your silver tears,
What is wrong today?
Is it 'cause you're blamed again,
While innocent at play?
As you watch the others run,
With evil on their lips,
You are caught in one mistake,
And ocean drowns your ship.
Corrupt a world, lets sinners pass,
As you serve for the crime,
The worst thing is, 'tis your fault,
That you're serving in the grime.
For you had chance to prove yourself
As what you really are,
But fear held you to the fiend,
Who left the door of blame ajar.
So now you're stuck as sinners should
Serve the rank you do,
Oh sister with your silver tears,
Damnation be to you.
Stormy Weather Friends
Dedicated to Ana
I came upon a place of stone where coldness was my mate
And knew that in my state alone some demons I'd create,
But as I stood inside this place I learned to call my home,
You came to me in cheerful mood and I was not alone.
You stood with me and held my hand as coldness blew on in,
And stopped me with your faith in G-d when I walked roads of sin,
And now I'm out but you are stuck in place I've known so long,
To walk away from your own pain I know would be so wrong.
So I'll stay with you and painful past- we'll share this place together,
And who knows, maybe far from now these days we'll learn to treasure,
But I know this- until it's done I'll stay with you 'til end,
And comfort you as you did me, and call myself your friend.
To Walk With An Angel
A glance of a shadow just crossed thy face
As if thy'd returned from holy place
Enlightened in one moment of time
Fatigued and intrigued from spiritual climb.
A holy image just swooped down
To wipe from thy face the dreadful frown
That for years has held thee prisoner.
Convincing thee that vision, clearer
Would result from the pain, the agony and strife
And the angel came down to make things right.
He said "The flowers still bloom in the midst of spring
Yet thou still goes on suffering.
But why, dear child, what's gone so wrong,
That cannot be healed with the tune of a song?"
Thou heard his question tried and true-
And contemplated how it should better you.
But He said "No- do not distress
Thy wounded mind. Put it at rest.
Is analyzing worth all the pain
The pain that it brings again and again?"
"But angel" thou cries "then how will I learn
From mistakes and advice- I long to burn
With the knowledge of life- unbeknownst to others
So I must understand all although I will suffer."
He took thy hands and said unto thee
"My child if you dare to walk with me
And believe in me when times grow hard
You will learn what you need to play your cards.
For nothing is better than to laugh and be free
And spread that feeling for all eternity."
Water on the Hand
Crystal tears like ice water,
Cripple my hand.
As the slow flow of gravity
Moves them to Hell.
Not fighting but accepting,
Their fate to harm the world.
If we so choose, if we let them,
Rust our hearts,
Expose our wounds, our painful pasts,
We through our tribulation know who they are,
We've been there ourselves,
Suffering through silence.
Bound to the devil's pact,
We broke the chains that held us there,
Ran as far as we could,
But have not yet succeeded
In loosening the metal from our wrists.
We are still there,
And He can still hurt us.
